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중편"햇볕한소금" (최종회)햇볕속에 숨을 거두다 |
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입력:
2006-10-14 09:02:16
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5.) 햇볕 속에 숨을 거두다.
그리고 그 환하던 할머니 얼굴이 떠올랐다. 응급실 앞에는 기자들로 웅성 거렸다.
“ 할머니가 농약을 마셨다면.”
“ 응! 할머니는 일조권 때문에 OO 건설회사와 싸우고 있던 중이래!”
”그런데 아들이 그 유일하게 버티던 집을 건설회사에 팔아 버렸대“
“아들을 기다리던 할머니는 집이 헐리는 것을 보시고 집 뒤에 두었던 농약을 마셨대”
기자들은 웅성거렸다.
사람들을 헤치고 응급실로 들어섰다. 할머니는 응급실 한쪽 곁에 산소 호흡기를 끼고 누어 계셨다. 송 아가 들어서자 할머니가 눈으로 반색을 했다. 송 아는 눈물이 왈칵 쏟았다.
“할머니! 이게 웬일이세요! 할머니”
송 아가 할머니 손을 잡자 의사에게 산소 호흡기를 데어 달라고 눈짓을 했다. 그리고 기운 없는 손으로 송 아를 가까이 오라! 하고 귀에다 대고
“색시! 저 커 텐 좀 걷어줘! 햇볕 좀 쐬게! “
하고 간신히 띄엄띄엄 말했다. 송 아는 울면서 커 텐을 걷었다. 햇볕이 할머니 위로 쏟아졌다.
할머니는 오랜만에 환한 얼굴을 하셨다. 예전에 봉천동에서 사진을 찍는 그때처럼 그렇게 행복한 얼굴이셨다. 할머니는 그렇게 조용히 숨을 거두셨다. 의사가 할머니의 눈에 불을 비쳐보더니
“ 운명하셨습니다!”
하고 사무적으로 말했다. 괴죄죄한 40대 사나이가 침대를 붙들고 오열을 터트렸다.
“어머니! 어머니! 제가 잘못 했습니다! 어머니!”
그가 바로 문제의 김 철수 인 것 같았다. 송 아는 허 탈했다. 할머니가 숨을 거두신 그 순간에 떠오르던 행복한 미소를 잊을 수가 없을 것 같았다. 병원에서 일하시는 분들이 할머니의 시신을 영안실로 옮겨가고 기자들이 몰려와 사진을 찍었다. 송 아는 맥이 풀려 사진기를 옆의 동료에게 건네주었다. 그리고는 쓰러질 듯 병원벤치에 주저앉았다.
송 아는 생각했다. 그 “햇볕 한소곰“ 할머니에게는 전부 이였던가? 그러면서 옛날 고대 그리스의 철학자 디오게네스의 일화가 생각났다. 그리스의 철학자 디오게네스는 통 속에서 살았다. 그는 퀴닉학파 철학자였는데 퀴닉학파란 희랍어의 퀴니코스(개와 같은)에서 나온 말이라고 한다. 그들은 세속적인 습관이나 형식 등을 무가치한 것이라 여겼다.
그 무렵 그리스 온 땅을 정복하여 세상 두려울 것이 없었던 알렉산더 대왕이 디오게네스의 평판을 듣고는 만나자고 했다. 그러나 디오게네스는 왕이 불러도 가지 않았다.
마침내 알렉산더 대왕이 몸소 그를 찾아갔다. 그때 디오게네스는 통 속에 앉아 볕을 쬐고 있었다.
"나는 알렉산더 대왕이오. 뭐 바라는 거라도 있으면 말해 보시오."
대왕의 말에 철학자는 통속에 누운 채 이렇게 말했다.
"저쪽으로 비켜 서 주십시오. 그늘이 집니다."
알렉산더는 왕궁으로 돌아오는 길에 깊은 생각에 잠겼다.
“만약 내가 알렉산더가 아니었더라면 저 디오게네스가 되고싶었으리라! “
인간은 행복해질 권리가 있다. 그것이 작은 것이던 큰 것이던가에 그 행복을 맺을 권리는 누구에게도 없다. 송 아는 생각 했다. 살아가는 동안 할머니 같은 불행한 이가 두 번 다시 나와서는 안 된다고 그러면서 영안실로 발걸음을 옮겼다. 햇볕 이 따사롭게 비치고 있었다. 할머니의 이 빠진 웃음처럼 포근하게.
- 끝-
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